Forbidden Kingdom
kung fu done right, or merely done?
2008-04-21
By Sergio Mims
CAST: Jackie Chan, Jet Li, Michael Angarano, Yifei Lu, Bingbing Li
WRITTEN BY: John Fusco
DIRECTED BY: Rob Minkoff and Woo-ping Yuen
Rated PG-13
** TWO STARS
If, according to the old expression that a camel is a horse designed by a committee, then The Forbidden Kingdom is a martial arts film conceived by a committee interested only in keeping the genre acceptable to Wal-Mart shoppers.
Unlike the great (even just simply good) kung fu films of the past that soar, amaze and exhilarate, Kingdom has no soul or exuberant joy, content to plod along swiping huge chunks of its plotline from much better films such as Jackie Chan’s Drunken Master I and II, Mad Monkey Kung Fu and The Bride With White Hair. Even the film’s numerous fight sequences are flat footed, devoid of the lightness and grace that infuse the best of the genre, burdened with awkward and obvious wire work and overblown CGI effects in a desperate attempt to disguise its shortcomings. The end result is as tasteless (and just as exciting) as plain oatmeal.
The preposterous storyline begins in Boston where a dorky kung–fu movie fanatic (Angarano) who, in between traveling to Chinatown to get his fix of DVDs from a kindly old shop keeper (Chan in an unconvincing make-up job), is regularly getting harassed and beaten up by a corny gang of thugs who look, act and talk as if they just stepped off the set of West Side Story.
After a robbery attempt by the gang and a chase to retrieve a precious and valuable golden staff the store keeper had in his possession, Angarano finds himself inexplicably and illogically transported to ancient China. He soon discovers that he is the Anointed One whose mission is to return the staff to its rightful owner, The Monkey
King (Li), turned into a statue by an evil warlord who wears more eye makeup than Beyonce.
In short order the dork is joined by a drunken wanderer in dreadlocks (Chan again) a monk (Li again) and a young woman out to avenge the death of her parents (Liu) at the hands of the evil warlord. Together the heroic team travels across blistering deserts and lush green forests encountering along the way not-so-thrilling adventures and villains and several comic lowlights including Chan being on the wrong end of a “golden shower” by Li.
One of the biggest mysteries is why the movie’s American and Chinese producers decided that Rob Minkoff (who co-directed the film with legendary master fight choreographer and director Woo-ping Yuen) would be a suitable choice for the film. Judging from his previous works (family oriented comedies such as the Stuart Little films and Eddie Murphy’s lousy The Haunted Mansion), it should have been obvious that Minkoff was not suited for the job and uniquely clueless about the structure and rhythms of a martial arts film.
What’s even more disappointing is the supposedly titanic meeting of Chan and Li for the first time in a film. Coming too late and for too little effect, the film further bungles it by not having them meet until a solid 45 minutes into the movie though their big fight scene in a temple provides one of the film’s true highlights.
Though Li, now in his 40’s still has the moves and lighting speed, the saddest element is Chan. Now well into his 50’s Chan is, physically, still fast and impressive. The great shame is that most American filmgoers didn’t get to really know him until his great days were past in stinkers such as the Rush Hour movies and The Tuxedo.
To appreciate the genius and mastery of Chan during the glory years (the 70’s to mid-90’s) in Hong Kong films such as Amour of God, the Project A series, Meals on Wheels and dozens of other extraordinary films
Is to see him at his at his most extraordinary, equal parts Bruce Lee and the brilliant silent film comedian and stuntman Buster Keaton. To see Chan in his last truly magnificent role, devotees and those who should see him at
the top of his game are advised to check out 2004’s New Police Story which was released straight to video in the U.S.
After all is said and done, The Forbidden Kingdom, is a tired, lackluster effort that could have been better if the people behind the camera had a real love and knowledge of the genre. If, in other words, they knew what the hell they were doing.
Film critic, lecturer and festival consultant Sergio Mims covers all things film from the city that works, Chicago. He is a regular contributor to ebonyjet.com