neycha photo 170x150
Ask Neycha: Still Hustlin'
because advice is one thing you can never get enough of
2008-07-10
send to a friend

Dear Neycha:
I’m a 39 year-old happily single brotha.  No kids or baby momma drama.  I like to keep it simple.  I’m self-employed dedicated to getting my professional goals to jump off.  Cash has been tight off and on, but I’m generally cool with that because I don’t have to support anybody else.   When I do, I plan to be in a better financial situation.  But because I’ll turn 40 in a few months my family and a few of my frat brothers think it’s time for me to hang up this music thing, get a "real" job and some real estate.  I disagree.  I got in the game late after grad school, and still had some early success in the beginning. Now I’ve just relocated to Atlanta (after being in NYC for the last 8 years trying to make something pop off) to regroup with a lower cost of living and to gather the energy to get back on my daily grind.  Am I crazy to stay on my hustle?
Still hustling, Atlanta


Dear Hustlin':
You can’t let the civilians of the world and their cookie-cutter ambitions define your position in life.  If your fam and frat bros are turned on by “real jobs” and real estate, tell them to get a few more – jobs and homes.  Give them back their intentions for your life and suggest they work those expectations into their own fold.  Then take them out of the equation because what “they say” shouldn’t even be relative.  Pursuing a dream is not something everyone will understand. You should know this.  It requires constant imagination, constant energy, and a super-sized cocktail of will, gumption and faith to walk in the direction of a dream whose delicate victory you may never touch.  You’ve got to be a bit insane with a whole lot of guts.  Are you there yet love?

What’s up with your hustle?   Why is it taking so long?  Are you certain that you are doing, giving, being everything you can to help facilitate an already nebulous pursuit?  There is no room for error or mediocrity.  You’ve got to bring you're A-game doll.  Knocking on 40’s door, you don’t have time to be pussyfooting around.  While you are regrouping, somebody else is busy becoming #1.  You must be about the business of elevating your game every single day.  Good is not good enough to succeed in a competitive industry.  Be better than everybody else in your market.  You’ve got to get your MVP K-O-B-E on. It’s not enough to just be in game, you’ve got to want to win with everything inside you.  Where is your urgency?  This is your “300” moment! You must be capable of being like a warrior whose singular ambition is something he’s willing to live and die for.  If this ain’t life or death to you, move out the way!  There are plenty ready to take your spot.  It’s about winning lovey!  Is it in you?

You’ve got to wrestle with and defeat your self-doubt. There’s nothing crazy about staying on your hustle IF you’re genuinely giving it all you’ve got.  IF you’re good with the amount of life you’re giving away for the pursuit of your dream, rock on. IF you’ve got unrelenting conviction and the agility to bounce back from rejection, rock on.  IF you’ve got the balls to continue artfully suffering the many small deaths on the battlefield of dreaming, then rock the hell on solider.  BUT IF you’re even a little bit squeamish about the thought of looking back in 10 years and finding meaning in your story if you just so happened to fall short of your music dream, then step away from the battle my love. Step away!  Chasing a dream, where there are no markers (graduations, annual reviews, accumulation of material possessions, etc.) to gage your progress by, is not for sissies. Consider doing something where the stakes are much lower, and the outcomes much more predictable.  Seriously, not everyone is cut out for it partner.  But if you KNOW you are, then blaze up the sky poppa.  Get your Rock Star on!

 

Following Love

For Submissions
By submitting a letter here, you grant EbonyJet.com permission to publish it on this site or elsewhere. However, be assured that your e-mail will only be identified with an anonymous descriptive name.  No last name, email address or location is given out. Please note that due to the volume of mail we receive, we cannot respond individually to every e-mail. Submit Now

The Ask Neycha column is for entertainment purposes only. 
Any information or advice given not intended to provide an alternative to or replacement for professional advice or the services of your physician, psychotherapist, or psychiatrist. 




15 Responses to "Ask Neycha: Still Hustlin'"

07.10.08 at 11:42 AM
A says:
Thanks Neycha! Life is too short to be wasting time doing anything you don't love.

07.11.08 at 8:22 AM
rev says:
WOW!!!!!

07.11.08 at 11:48 AM
Karen says:
excellent advice.

07.11.08 at 7:28 PM
Nicole says:
I agree with Karen you gave excellent advice. You have to fulfill your dreams, not others expectation of you. You have to live for you, believe in you, the others will follow when they see how driven you are.

07.15.08 at 7:45 PM
She says:
Neycha, this was so powerful (and so true). thank you!!

07.16.08 at 1:46 PM
Wole says:
Was just minding my business, reading this all the way in London and you went and dropped some serious advice on a brotha. My situation is not exactly the same as his but God bless you for inadvertently being my alarm clock of reason.

07.18.08 at 12:47 AM
neycha says:
hey loveys. thanks for sounding off on this one. hustling "ain't" child's play! lol.

and Wole, i'm mad appreciative that you were "minding your business - all the way in london" reading my column. that's what's up.

keep checking in love.

make it rock peeps!

07.19.08 at 3:57 PM
china says:
there was an article in ebony that mentioned a hair styles that developed his on hairline. Please provide the name of the hairline via email.

07.19.08 at 11:37 PM
Don Austin says:
Neycha You do not need to be afraid to reply to this in secret ...or public any way is good.I hear you helping people out and everything...telling them what might good and all,but I want to know if you have a good man like myself who can show you some attention,if not lets talk and see how things are.Easy.

07.21.08 at 11:34 AM
sdfsdf says:
Fact #1) There is no such thing as a "light-skinned Black".

Fact #2) The term "light-skinned Black" is an OXYMORON.

Fact #3) If a person who has been categorized as "black"
is also "light skinned" that means that they are
Mixed-Race ... and that they are not 'Black'.

Fact #4) A person's Socio-Political "Identification" is not
the same thing as their "Ancestral Admixture"

07.23.08 at 4:32 PM
ListenToLeon says:
This was great advice. I couldn't have said it any better. Then again, I guess that's why Ebony/Jet chose YOU to write this column for them! :)

Leon

07.27.08 at 6:59 AM
Sunshine says:
I agree with Neycha. You have to follow your dream but also remember that you have to prepare yourself for the future. Retirement, if you continue to wait so long and your dream is taking more time than life, you might need to evaluate your plan. Might need to get a plan B while working on plan A.

08.01.08 at 2:14 PM
bukunmi blerose says:
please my name is bukunmi blerose, i love your magazine 2007 edition, greater height you guys shall ever be, please send me magazine @ gpo box 4240, dugbe, ibadan, nigeria. bleroseclicks@yahoo.com

09.13.08 at 4:35 AM
Amina says:
Life is too short.How many more years u think u got,gotta get ur game together bro.luv ur mag.

09.30.08 at 12:51 PM
Lekicia says:
I believe someone else said it best with "WOW!!"
Reading it I felt like there was some "lets get ready to rush into battle" music in the background. I found myself skippin around in my head to different opportunities missed in my life. Im kinda in the same position as Hustlin. I say never give up because for me the pursuit is still doin what i love. Being an artist is as much about the journey as getting there. Keep up the excellent work on your "art" Neycha

Leave a comment:
(500 character limit)

Visit Our Sponsor Links



Email a friend this article

Your Email:
Friend's Email:
Subject:
Message:
 

Inside:

The 50 Million Pound Challenge

"I¹m not getting on the scale anymore until the end of the Challenge. I know I¹m losing weight because of the clothes I¹m fitting into; my arms, my face are getting smaller. But, I know me -- if I see I¹ve lost 20 lbs I¹ll go and get a pizza."

-Lekicia Young
Participant in the 50 Million Pound Challenge

 

 


Money
Money
Music
Music
Jet
Jet
Ebony
Ebony

About Us | Advertise | Employment Opportunities | Subscribe | FAQ | Contact Us | This Week In JET | This Month In EBONY | RSS Feeds
© 2008 Johnson Publishing Company, Inc. | Privacy Policy and Legal Terms | Join Experts @ EbonyJet.com


Disclaimer: Ebonyjet.com is an online publication featuring news, analysis, commentary and opinion. Opinions expressed in its content do not necessarily reflect the opinion of Johnson Publishing Company.
Click Here Click Here Click Here Click Here